Days Until Opening Day 2009

Friday, July 27, 2007

Igawa is a Bum....ok Not a bum but he stinks (AND BONUS AC EDITION)


Now I am not saying that he is as worthless as say Carl Pavano, but Igawa just can't seem to get his act together. Every time he does a stint in the minors its like Torre is sending him to the corner for a time out. He comes back full of promise, but then disappoints all over again. There is no question that once Phil Hughes returns (which should be next week or the week after) Igawa will be sent down for the rest of the season. I think the problem is that he thinks too much. You can't try to fine tune each and everyone of your pitches, you just have to feel it. Igawa may benefit by watching a little movie called Bull Durham. How funny would that be if he actually tried wearing ladies underwear when he pitched. Funnier still if it worked for him.




In other news I am off to Sin City tonight.....no not Vegas, but Vegas' red headed stepchild that is hidden in the basement and chained to a wall every time guests come over. That's right, you guessed it....ATLANTIC CITY NEW JERSEY BABY. For those of you who have never been to Atlantic City (lovingly referred to as AC) let me paint a picture using the Monopoly board, which in fact is based on the city.




Mediterranean Avenue - Rent $2 dollars, with hotel $60 - The real Mediterranean avenue is actually a lot like the Monopoly one. There really are no buildings there both because the ones that had been there are crumbling, or just because no one wants to buy a property that is hardly ever landed on and when it is, doesn't pay that much.




Jail - Cost to get out $50 or Rolling Doubles. In both Monopoly and the real AC your chances of winding up there are about the same, but getting out will probably cost you more than $50 dollars and rolling doubles wont get you out since that is probably what got you in there in the first place.




Free Parking - Rent, Free of course. A favorite for "house rules" we used to play that if you landed here you would win money from the middle of the board. In AC there is no free parking unless you car has been stolen, or you are playing at a Casino. House rules apply at the Casinos of course, but chances are you aren't going to win any money.




Water Works - Rent Determined by a roll of the dice - Atlantic City doesn't actually have a Water Works, instead its water is piped in from the New Jersey "mainland" through two pipes. Given that fun fact, you are rolling the dice so to speak every time you dare drink the water.




Community Chest - There are plenty of "Community Chests" in AC, however they are not little yellow cards (I think you can see where I am going with this here). If you choose a community chest in AC you might wind up turning yellow but you certainly are not going to get second place in a beauty contest.




Illinois Avenue - Rent $18 dollars, with hotel 1,100. One of the Reds, Illinois Avenue is a sought after property for both its high rent value, and high probability of landing there. The real Illinois Avenue however was renamed Martin Luther King, Jr. Blvd. in the 1980s. If you find yourself here you're in trouble...just trust me on that one.




Boardwalk - Rent $50, with Hotel $2,000 - The gem of the Monopoly board boardwalk is the most valuable property there is. The rents being so high one would expect the real boardwalk to be just as glamours....nope! The real boardwalk is a mixture of depressing music being pumped from the casinos, cheesy two bit "massage parlors" and fortune teller stands, crazies, homeless, and the occasional tourist who didn't realize what they were getting themselves into when they hailed one of those bike taxis. Throw in a few empty syringes on the beach and your advanced token to Boardwalk may not draw the same level of excitement as your used to.




So anyway wish me luck, and if you happen to find yourself there tonight I'll be at the 1/2 poker tables somewhere on the boardwalk.

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